My Name is Earl

Here's where it all started.

Tom couldn't buy beer at the Soopy because he didn't have any ID. Marc went to buy the beers for him and the checkout lady said he could n't do that either.

Then I stepped in, told Tom off, told the lady he was my son, she told me I should know better and we left with no beers.

Tom not happy.

I drove to next liquor store and ordered everyone to get out.

We had a pint of Emmerson's Pilsner.

Then another.

Then I think Marc wanted to go home, but I said we'll have another and Marc can you drive please.

I think lots of Dunedin mtb people converged upon Pembroke Wines & Spirits at this point because the place was packed.

Then I saw this guy walking across the street, yelled at him, he yelled back then joined us for more beer.

We got silly, told filthy jokes, I dropped my camera in my beer but it still works because it's waterproof.

Keighley texted and said where are you ?

I replied we had done the shopping and were nearly ready to collect the pop up tent for the mtb race the next day.

Marc was urging us to go - evidently rang Keighley and said Richard won't leave - help.

Keighley texted me and said come home now, you're fucking it up for everyone.

We left.

Except I co-erced Tom into doing a runner to Waterbar where they were having Octoberfest.

We, mainly I, thought we were hilarious with our $10 Steins of Carlsberg.

Just before 9pm, Tom texted this message to Marc:

"Richard is hammered. Please come and get us in 28 minutes when I have finished this stein"

Then the bouncer(s) walked in wearing a shirt and tie under a hoody to which I enquired why would you wear a tie in Wanaka ?

Tom was frantically trying to tell me he's the bouncer, to which I paid no heed.

"Because I work here" he replied.

What do you do I asked ?

"I'm the bouncer ! "

Hey, buddy you can wear whatever you like as long as I leave with my teeth shortly.

Marc arrived, we went home, my name was mud (again) I may have been just the tiniest bit sick and went to bed with no supper.

In fact I couldn't stomach anything until 12.30 the next day.
And after seeing Marc running with this man/girl I'm not surprised.